Nightmares

I had a nightmare, this has been going on for a few nights now.

I have a new kind of nightmare, nobody dies in the dream, it only hurts when I wake up.

I dream of a time when I was loved, of a time when I wasn't alone and when I felt safe and a part of something instead of a loose piece.

Everything is calm and so peaceful, in the dream things feel right and natural, like it has always been like that. things aren't complicated and they never got messed up.

It's funny that I don't dream with who still makes me happy. I don't know why I only dream with who broke me. I was happy, so why not you? Why should you dream with the dead?

The dead make me tired when I wake up. I can't sleep anymore. I say it's the morning light in my room, the irony of it fills me. Remind yourself that everything changes, I just can't seem to make my heart learn not to mess with my dreams, my brain feels weird when I wake up.

No

I don't love you

I don't want you

I don't need you

Yes

I miss love

I miss a friend

I miss the warm

None of these things are connected. But sadly the worst is part of the best. The only frame of reference I have ends in a ... way, so that's what I dream of.

I thought I had a new frame, but you were made of watercolors, not even I can build of that.

I am sick. I am a sick potato and i'm turning into Vodka. I hope