Time is relative, ten minutes can seem to last forever, or can go by in what feels like a second.
Sometimes you can see it. You know you have time, but you can feel it slip away, you see it ending and somehow it hasn't even begun. I look for endings, never look for beginnings.
Beginnings happen even when you don't want them, need them or search for them. They just happen like wild flowers.
Endings always happen, inevitable balance of life, you can feel them all the time. I am a forced optimist, i force myself to believe that good things will happen and that the "heart of life is good".
Now the truth.
I feel endings. The slow death of something that you love, every time something starts i feel the shadow of the time when it will inevitably end, i spend whatever time i still have thinking about the ending. My multitudes are never never in the sun together.
Endings consume everything, nothing exists without the certain of its end so everything is tainted by it.
The fact that you know that everything ends, makes you aware of the frailty of things, makes you enjoy them more, and be grateful for their existence. No. It makes you sad. Aware that nothing is set in stone. Be grateful for what you have, it will all end.
How dark. Life is good. the bad things make it wonderful. The trick, find a way do enjoy endings, they are a part of something bigger and much more complicated then what we can understand, they make you who you are and determine what you will be. Living in fear is not living, so
Live filled with gratitude and glee for where you are and what you have. So full that all the sadness can't seep trough. Live it and love it. Drown it.
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